twenty

sometimes
the one thing that gets me through the day
is the thing that ruins everything
and i sleep, unsatisfied

why is it
that the moment i say that i trust it
it falls apart in my hands?
everything crumbles
wet sand falling in heaps
splattering with a thud
and i'm not left new again
but old and tired and empty
i didn't think you'd let me down
and it seems you have

i'm so tired of fucking games